Thursday, December 14, 2017

Thoughts on Thursday

Yesterday I asked the boys to hand me their Thursday folders when they arrived home after school. They laughed and told me it was Wednesday. We are on a day by day bases at this point in the season and sometimes it's hour by hour (and obviously I've even struggling with that).

Last Thursday Katherine turned 1. I cried most of the day. My last baby is now 1. I am so grateful to have had the baby days 4 times over but I am so so sad to never have them again. I love nursing babies to sleep, snuggling with them in a wrap, kissing their chubby cheeks. Once I wondered why I don't kiss KC's cheeks like I used to, so I did it. I got multiple hands to the face shoving me away and then remembered why I stopped. Katherine doesn't nurse to sleep anymore, doesn't fit in the wrap (the Ergo still works though), but she lets me kiss all over her. For over a decade I've either been pregnant, nursing, or trying to get pregnant (minus about a year in there after we had the boys). It feels like the end. It absolutely drives me nuts when moms refer to this time as a "season." I want to scream, seasons are cyclical, this time is never coming back! And I've never felt it more than last Thursday.

Other than my birthday blues, the holiday season has marched on. We've done craft night at church, seen Santa (again at church, so glad he's a member at ours), made gingerbread houses uptown, visited the gingerbread houses on the outside of town, attended a holiday party (first time in years), picked our trees, decorated said trees (the boys did most of it this year), and I've been wrapping presents nightly. I still have too many people to shop for and not enough present ideas!  (where's the older kid gift guide?! toddlers are a breeze! my husband, totally know what he wants, have my mom and dad figure out too... but I have a few preteens and teens I'm shopping for and man that is tough.. we did tons of gift cards last year).

We've had basketball, piano (recital this weekend!), and birthday parties (with the most awesome train ever). And all I can think is, when can I take a breath. And then I follow that up with "you brought this on yourself." I think winter break will be a nice time to slow down (remind of me of that when I complain about the boys going stir crazy and fighting).

We had a leak under our kitchen sink the week before Thanksgiving and now I'm freaked out about mold.

I had a DSL camera I loved and I dropped it at the beach years ago. I bought a new one (an upgraded model) and my pictures are blurry! I thought the point of a DSL was not to have blurry pictures. Any clue what's going on? Do I need to leave it in sports setting?

 And I'll stop my rambling and leave this post with a goofy pic of my last babe after bath (ignore the two tone wall in the background please, slowly removing the lighthouse and boat border to paint, although the island double sink will have to stay so I guess it's more lipstick on a pig).